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Road
Map Activity
Reprinted
from TLC’s Trauma Intervention Program, by William Steele, Teen
Workbook, Activity Worksheet 2.3
For
Teens
Click
here to download a pdf file of the Road Map from the Past suitable for
printing.
Acrobat Reader is needed to open the Road Map. Click here for a free
download.
Print the Road Map
from the Past and
give it to your teenager. Ask him to put his current age and
birth date on the appropriate lines. Explain
that the streets on
the right side of the main drag are destinations, places he has lived
or visited, schools he attended, places he has spent time at.
The streets
on the left side are the bad and good things that have happened along
the way. For instance, if the first destination is going to school
and something
bad happened at that time (like a divorce, death, etc.) write it on the
road map. Write in some good things that happened as well. (It doesn’t
have to be major. Something as common as learning to ride a bike is a
good place to start if the teen gets stuck.)
Help your teen only if he is having a hard time getting started.
Your child may not remember things that happened in pre-school
and before.
From first
grade on it will be easier. Ask him to focus on the good things; things
he did with his parents, grandparents, etc. - getting a bike, riding
without training wheels, winning some competition, getting praised
for special
projects in school, making a new friend, being promoted to the next
grade, new addition to the family, etc. Do not, however, neglect
the “bad” things
that happened.
After the road map is filled in show your teen how the trauma
is just one part of his life. Good things have
happened too. Despite the trauma(s)
in your teen’s life he continues to move forward and accomplish
new things. There is a part of your child that is a survivor. (Use
your own
words, but do stress the survivor point.)
Point out the fact that in the scheme of your teen’s life, he
keeps moving forward - driving down the road to the future. Every now
and then
there are some spots that slow him down, just like when there is construction
work on the expressway. He keeps moving forward to the next destination.
He gets further away from some of the bad things that have happened
to him and he has some successes. He gets more and more experience
at surviving
the hard times.
When something traumatic happens it’s like construction crews have
put up a “Road Closed” sign, or a “Detour, Next Left” sign.
This is no easy detour either. The road is full of potholes. It’s
only two lanes. Your teen can’t pass the car in front of him. He’s
got to go at their pace. Unfortunately, a trauma can push your child off
the road. It can be filled with so many obstacles that he can lose his
sense of direction. He forgets where he wanted to go or he may feel like
it’s best to just stay off the main road and not worry about going
anywhere because it’s too dangerous. Many people who have experienced
a trauma think a whole lot of other horrible things are going to happen
to them or others close to them if they keep going.
Remind your child that trauma is just one part of his life. Yes, it
is a challenge. Yes, it is hard. It may hurt him and scare him, but
it only
has the power to intimidate him, to keep him moving down side roads
and detours, when he loses sight of his destination. A destination
acts like
a magnet that keeps us moving forward even when there are detours.
A destination can always change, but when he doesn’t have any
destination in front of him, his trauma will keep him moving down the
back roads, side roads,
going nowhere.
Next, ask your teenager to answer these questions. These questions
will help your teen decide on a destination that will get him back
on the
main street.
Questions about your teen’s
future:
- I
want a career as:
- Of
all the people I know today I want to be most like:
- Because:
- When
I am older the one thing I want everyone to say about me the most
is that I:
Finally,
click here to download the Road Map to the Future. Ask
your child to fill the map in with
his or her goals, hopes and dreams. This map will help your child articulate
and focus on his or her hopes for the future.
Click
here to download a pdf file of the Road Map to the Future suitable for
printing.
Acrobat
Reader is needed to open the Road Map. Click here for a free download.
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Parents Trauma Resource Center
www.tlcinstitute.org • 877-306-5256
© TLC Institute 2004
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