Some Things to Do if You are Experiencing Denial

If you believe your child has not been seriously impacted by his or her experience, it may be because of fear. To accept that any child who is old enough to play is old to enough to experience all the reactions of trauma, is to accept how vulnerable and fragile children are at heart.

“Children are resilient,” is a phrase that is not true, but it sure makes life initially easier as a parent. If they are resilient, then they’ll outgrow any bad experience that comes their way. If we believe this then we really don’t need to worry.The fact is, children are vulnerable when it comes to a traumatic experience. Even the healthiest, best parented child is likely to experience terror, fear for their safety, and worry about what will happen next.

This may be hard for you to hear or understand if you have never experienced a trauma. Today’s child is over-exposed to frightening situations outside the home, to pressures and stress that did not exist previously. This leaves them vulnerable. If you deny your child has been affected by the experience, you literally leave your child alone to deal with his or her fears and worries. Children will not do well on their own and will feel abandoned by you - something they do not easily express or manage. You may not see it immediately because your child picks up his cues from you and “shuts down.” Unfortunately, in time your child's behavior and moods will change. Problems will develop. We can only encourage you to accept that your child does need help.

How to Relieve Denial

• Let your child see a trauma specialist to evaluate the reactions he or she is experiencing. Remember not all trauma reactions are observable.
• If the trauma specialist suggests that your child could benefit from some help, four to eight sessions should be helpful. You will see the results in the way your child relates to you and expresses him or herself.
• Anticipate that trauma reactions can change at anytime.
• If you can provide your child with a sense of safety, your child will come to trust and treasure you very deeply.
• Click on Activities for ways to help your child restore a sense of safely.
  

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Parents Trauma Resource Center
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