BRIEF REPORT

Moving Can Become Traumatic
William Steele, Caroline H. Sheppard

This article is reprinted from TLC's Journal, TRAUMA AND LOSS: Research and Interventions, Volume 3, Number 1, 2003

William Steele, MSW, PsyD, is the founder and director of The National Institute for Trauma and Loss in Children, as well as consultant to schools and agencies across the country and a frequently requested presenter in the area of children and trauma. He is the author of over fifteen books on trauma.

Caroline H. Sheppard, ACSW has her Masters Degree in Social Work from University of Michigan. She has been a Clinical and School Social Worker for twenty years and she is the author of Brave Bart: A Story for Traumatized and Grieving Children. Ms. Sheppard completed certification as a Trauma and Loss School Specialist and Consultant from TLC. She serves on the Board of HANDY, Inc. (Helping Abused Neglected Dependent Youth), in Broward County, Florida.

As adults, we have all moved in our lives. Some moves are welcomed and exciting. Some moves are filled with happy anticipation; some are filled with stress and angst. Even when a move is planned and something we want, it stirs up a variety of strong feelings. If you reflect on a stressful move you may have had in your life, you can probably remember the feelings associated with it. Now, imagine you are a child, who has to move through no choice of your own, and add that it’s a move resulting from a traumatic experience. When a child has to move it is often completely out of their control. “Most of the stress is felt by those people (children) who didn’t make the decision to move,” said Dr. Frederick Medway, a child psychologist at the University of South Carolina in Columbia, who studied the effects of mobility on families. There will of course be feelings attached to any move, but the child will most likely be able to cope with the move, and may even benefit from the experience if prepared and supported by a warm, loving family. On the other hand, many issues of concern come to light if a child has to move because of reasons such as, a violent loss of a family member, placement in a foster home, destruction of their home due to a fire, flood, tornado or hurricane, terrorism, incarceration of a parent, or an accidental death of a parent, or divorce.

Anyone who has worked with children has seen the effects of such a move. Teachers, in particular, have children come through their doors everyday, who are negatively affected by a move, socially, emotionally or academically. Research supports that moving has negative consequences on learning.

Below is a brief summary of a compilation of research and information, which supports the need for programs and services to address the issues specific to traumatic moves and its effect on children. Those of you who work with children won’t be surprised by the research; it will confirm what you already recognize and know to be true.

The National Network for Children (2003) reports that each year one out of every five American families moves, representing nineteen percent (19%) of the population. “Moving may be one of the most stress producing experiences a family faces,” suggests the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, (Facts for Families, 1999). In addition, Dr. Arlen Fulton, of Ohio State University (2002) also indicates that, “many child development experts see moving as one of the most disruptive events in a child’s life.”

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in children can also be triggered by a traumatic move. A key component involved may indeed be a feeling of powerlessness, and an absence of a sense of safety. (Steele and Raider 2002). When families must move because of a traumatic situation, the adults often are ill equipped to respond to the child’s emotional needs. Oftentimes, parents underestimate their children’s feelings (Bruce, 2003). Leonard Jason, psychology professor at De Paul University, states, “Most parents are pretty insensitive. They don’t understand the child’s point of view.” Because the parents may be undergoing their own stress related to the move, many issues evolve; the child may feel powerless, alone, fearful, angry and afraid to ask for help, or share their feelings, for fear of worrying the adults in their lives even more. If they see their parents crying, arguing, or simply stressing over the basic inconveniences associated with moving, they may interpret their parent’s behavior as being their fault. This is especially true with younger children.

Facts for Families (1999) indicate that studies show that, “children who move frequently are more likely to have problems at school.” The Orlando Sentinel, reports that “Students who change schools often are more likely to fall behind in reading, because they miss lessons in the march from school to school.” They further indicate that, “As many as one in three students in Central Florida switches schools during the year,” according to the most recent data available. (January 8, 2003). Florida is not alone in statistics such as these. Greg Lindberg, who compiled the data involving schools states, “What does seem to be quite clear is that moving really negatively affects the attendance, which profoundly affects the test scores.”

Sometimes children who kill are children who had to move to a new school, or to a new state or neighborhood, resented it and lacked the social and coping skills to adapt and “fit in.” Children can experience, “fear, the pain of separation, and other anxieties like adults” (Fullton, 2002). The “new kid” syndrome can lead to bullying, ridicule, outcasting as well as physical abuse from other kids. For example, on March 5, 2001, Charles Andrew Williams, a 15 year old, shot and killed two students at his suburban high school in San Diego, California. Williams was said to have tried to “fit in” at the 1,900 pupils Santana High School after moving to California the previous year from Maryland. (Gun Violence in America, Guardian Newspapers Limited, 2002)

Awareness, sensitivity, insight and knowledge, along with programs, school policy (Newcomers Clubs e.g., teacher training, counseling interventions, etc.), school policies and supportive tools for schools and families, such as books, may be the preventative key in helping children; especially those who move due to a traumatic life event, or because of a family crisis. Perhaps interventions which focus on coping with changes will help young children learn the coping skills necessary to survive the associated pain and loss. We as clinicians, school social workers, counselors, teachers and parents need to pay attention to the child who has moved and recognize the potential for this to be an opportunity for growth for the child but also a potential danger related to the negative responses to moving and being the “new kid.” Thinking that children are resilient and will “get over it” generally is not helpful in our attempts to see the world through a child’s eyes.

The TLC publication of, Brave Bart: A Story for Traumatized and Grieving Children, has taught us a thousand times over that parents do need resources that allow them to talk to their children about their traumatic experiences. And children most of all need their parents to be the ones helping them make sense of and normalize their thoughts and feelings. With this in mind in the spring of 2003 TLC will publish, Shadow Moves. It will be in the same format as Brave Bart, fully illustrated and generic so it will address many of the worries and fears of moving regardless of the cause for the move. Like Brave Bart it will normalize reactions and help children focus on their ability to survive the fears and challenges they are experiencing or have experienced.

We are now beginning to realize that because our children are exposed to far too much too early in life they are seeing life as a scary place to be, overwhelming and unsafe. Moving today presents many more risks and challenges than in the past. Any way that we can engage children to make us a “witness” to what moving is like for them, will help them feel not so alone, not so fearful and better able to survive the challenges that moving presents.